i think what liyi said about lives going thru ups and downs is true.. oh well.. after clearly most of my work and readings todae, i feel bit betta.. thank God i learn things fast.

todaes svc was.. i dunno.. moving.. partly cos i wasnt feeling too well emotionally, and i wasnt tokking to the person sitting next to me.. but yah, i think we all need such jolting msgs about our faith sometimes. i think i shud like shine for God more and not hide it.. like kelv saes.. msut have personal conviction bout our faith. i wish i had LOTSA instead of the little one i have. hmmz

tmr is fluffie's final class and her test... i hope she passes it :)

just left with DM readings and tutorial.. yAwns..
- posted by espieee36 @ Sunday, August 31, 2003

 
well i just quarrelled with bohao over *big island*

so stoopid. it feels the same except i really feel like giving up this time. sigh
- posted by espieee36 @ Sunday, August 31, 2003

 
im starting to fully realize the idea of stress. feel almost like im going mad.. having so many little things to take care of. dis admin thing.. meeting this or that person.. aRghs. i am feeling a myriad of feelings all at once.. like stress, happy, lonely, restless, busy, tired, active... i dunno wot is wrong with me.. and my feelings r all hay wire.. helps..

yet these few daes im exceptionally close to God, the moment there is trouble i pray.. i pray when i need His peace... perhaps we realli draw close to God in dark ages.

im starting to feel torn apart by all the pple i love.. i feel compelled to meet up with everyone who is only back here for a while.. so much so that im starting to feel i have no time for myself. its not that i dun enjoy the time with them.. perhaps i just have too much on my mind. i miss the hols... when i can just fall asleep without thinking..

i decided to withdraw from camp comm.. mainly cos i wun be there cos of india..

life is so transcient i dunno why im taking it so hard.. kelvin..en huai.. yunsian.. all recent memories of how fragile my life is. how i cud be gone the next moment.. but yet i cant let go. ARGHS!

i think dis entry not going to make sense to most pple.. but nm..

helpppppppp

but im glad i had the conversation with jo, when she reminded me to think of things that are pure, noble etc.. phillipians 4:8. *thanx* at least i feel more confident im not stepping into depression.

random pple been coming to my mind.. chienhan.. andrew..kim liang.. adeline.. i wunder why.. there is no link.. there is no reason.. i feel rather deranged.. lalalz
- posted by espieee36 @ Thursday, August 28, 2003

 
oh everyday passes by so quickly.. and jo is going back tonite.. or rather earli tmr morning oredi.. juz finished tokkign to her on the fone and managed to tell her something i have wanted to sae to her for months.. or izzit years now.. hahaz. oh wellz, but yah she is starting to sound like a preacher, which is not a bad thing, but i guess it wun go down most pple's throats if they arent closed to her. mebbe im juz used to saeing things in a non provocative way? *lauGhs(

cant realli recall wot i have been doing.. but yah, todae had first project india meeting..and i actualli feal scared about going to india. like being swarmed by people the moment i step out of airport. but i guess being able to see taj mahal, live in a desert and being with bohao doing all that is worth the effort. but i am going to dress very poorly.. and not bring my cam.. hhaz..

basically other than that, being bz with skool work, admin stuff for exchange, catching up. met up with cheryl, sharon, jo and adeline and im juz so happi to see everyone together.. pity diana cudnt make it. and like sharon has been gone for FOUR yrs.. its so scarie. i still remember meeting up with her at bugis for the last time b4 she left. so much has changed then but i am glad all our frenships are still intact :)

now going deciding to continue with CG in VCF.. i fink the idea to do BS with grace is super cool hehez..

k k shall go train fluff.. byE!

- posted by espieee36 @ Wednesday, August 27, 2003